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Post by Liz on May 14, 2006 21:09:37 GMT -5
Doc Madden brought up a good point when he asked Dixie if she thought it was right to take Kate away from the only parents she's ever known. That would be horrible for any child, so I'm wondering what you guys think about it? What would you do? ?
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Post by kallietop on May 14, 2006 21:56:28 GMT -5
how old would kate be - 4 ish? she's too old to be uprooted from the only mommy and daddy she loves - granted they are good parents. But how could you not want your child in a situation like this?? i think all of you can tell kallie is my life. she taught me how to love - she is amazing. but being a mom is learning how to be completly selfless. i would do anything for her - her happiness, her health which includes her mental health. who am i to uproot a stable happy child? i don't know - it would kill me and i hope no one in the real world, even people i don't like, to have to make an aweful choice.
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Post by Chris on May 14, 2006 22:39:04 GMT -5
What if the family isn't stable? She doesn't even know what kind of parents Madden put her with, and at this point you can't really trust his word - - he stole her baby for goodness sakes. Maybe the right thing would be to ensure that the family is a good one and if so, let her live that ife, but I can tell you that's not what I would do. If my child was stolen at birth and I had a chance to get him/her back, I don't care how long it takes, I would do it.
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Post by kallietop on May 14, 2006 22:47:15 GMT -5
if the family wasn't "stable" of course. and outside appearences aren't always as they seem. as you can tell by my above answer it's a damn hard question to answer. i can't answer it. more than anything i want my child happy. i also would die without her. i hear you move on blah blah. i would die without her. i would seriously step in front of a mac truck for her. so what do you do for the child's sake. and how old is she? i know how long dixie been gone but could they make her10 or 12??? would that make a difference? i will stop writing on this thread. my heart and my head are being pulled away. i tend to go with my heart and just grab her and hold on. you can always do family and/or individual thearpy!!!!!
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Post by rykenrocks on May 15, 2006 11:07:44 GMT -5
such a tough situation. there was a movie about that subject and i think there had been a hospital mixup with the 2 baby girls. when it was found out the mother of one wanted her back but she had grown attached to the woman who raised her. it was soo heartwrenching but since the wrong family were wonderful people the real mother decided to let them contonue to raise her but be a part of her life. i think the other child had died or something like that. suffice it to say it was a tearjerker.
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Post by minkie on May 15, 2006 13:56:30 GMT -5
I'm sorry but 4 years old is NOT too old to uproot Kate. Chances are she won't remember those adopted parents, you don't keep many memories from age 4. It will not scar her for life or anything.
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Post by rykenrocks on May 15, 2006 14:00:47 GMT -5
ia i was adopted at age 5 and in numerous foster homes. my memeories are pretty limited before that.
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Post by Liz on May 15, 2006 14:04:39 GMT -5
I have memories from before the age of 3, so I think it depends on the person and how good their memory is. I don't know how I have these memories, but they're perfectly clear. I remember our old house VERY clearly, and things that happened there (nothing bad at all), like riding my bike w/ friends, the TV in my room, the complete layout of the house, a birthday I had there, etc. Don't ask me how I remember all that, but I do.
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Post by rykenrocks on May 15, 2006 14:08:05 GMT -5
right i have a few . some are little things and some stand out, like meeting my adoptive parents for the first time, but overall they are pretty slim pickins.
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Post by Liz on May 15, 2006 14:11:44 GMT -5
WOW, that's crazy. I can't imagine living in foster homes and stuff, then finally meeting the family you're going to go home with, to live happily ever after . Pretty cool.
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Post by rykenrocks on May 15, 2006 14:16:54 GMT -5
thanks! it's actually pretty wild stuff my story,LOL maybe i should sell it to Lifetime, rotfl but i am grateful. i have seen the specials about adoption odds for older children, utterly heartbreaking!
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Post by minkie on May 15, 2006 14:27:12 GMT -5
I know its different for everyone but chances are that Kate will at best have only a handful of dim memories of this time. My earliest memory is around age 3 but there's only one or two of them, I don't remember a lot else.
So IMO Madden using that excuse isn't a good one. Kate probably won't remember, and Dixie and Tad deserve their daughter.
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Post by Liz on May 15, 2006 14:41:15 GMT -5
Ryken, I'd really love to hear your story one day!!
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Post by rykenrocks on May 15, 2006 14:51:50 GMT -5
thanks Liz,i'd be happy to share it when i have more time. I'll post it on the general board, if that's okay.
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Post by Liz on May 15, 2006 14:55:32 GMT -5
That's fine! I can't wait to read it.
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