Post by trixie on Nov 25, 2006 18:33:07 GMT -5
Acck! No, it's NOT that!
The Moralizing Martins vs The Chippie’s Chandlers - Friday Football
Color commentary Dr. Hayward
Referees: Myrtle, Ruth, Joe, Jackson, Palmer, Opal and Brooke
Cheerleaders: KWAK, Babe, Bianca, Josh, Erica, Kendall and Simone
Mascot: Spike
Coin Toss: Chandlers win. They choose to receive
Tad kicks off
Adam catches the ball and runs ten yards up the center before fumbling. Tad recovers the ball and tosses it to KWAK.
KWAK throws it into the stands where Dr. Hayward catches it. KWAK leads the cheer: “Give me a W, Give me a T, Give me a D! What’s that spell? What’s that spell?
BABE: Um, Josh? Jamie? Some random guy to be named later?
KWAK: You’re your mamma’s babydawl after all.
Adam, now, balless must decide what tactic his team should use. Huddling, the Chandlers pass a bottle of scotch and decide that they can still play, minus their ball but look to TIIC for signals.
Adam: They’re giving the Hail Mary Signal.
JR: Well, how many rosaries do we have between us?
Adam: Um, well at last count, NONE.
JR: Pass that scotch here.
Adam: Wait, now TIIC are giving us the finger. I say we punt.
JR: But it’s only second down.
Adam: Yes, but had KWAK punted on second down, we wouldn’t be here right now and you wouldn’t be a big brother yet again.
JR: I love you, dad.
Commercial
LIKE A ROCK. Ye gads, can’t this commercial erode already. The Grand Canyon did and in less time than this commercial has been airing.
Spike comes out dressed in a kiddie pool and a hockey uniform. Fans go crazy. “Where’s his water wings?” It’s an outrage.
Back to the game –
Dr. Hayward: I want a personal foul performed against Tad
Ruth: I don’t think you’re allowed to give PERSONAL commentary, David.
Dr. Hayward: Well, this coming from a woman no one’s seen in thirty-years, wears an apron and lives in an attic. I want a personal foul committed against Tad and I’m willing to do it myself. Someone needs to. And soon.
Myrtle: I think that the Chandlers are in big trouble. Excuse me, I’m meeting Zach for a martini or two. I’ll come back after I reapply my lipstick and give my opinions after the final score. Which hopefully I’ll get one first.
Somehow the game is over and the score is 123 to 122 in over-time. Jamie made the final free-throw, Tad hit Adam with his hockey puck, Ryan punched the clock out and Jonathon killed all the umpires because the fans told him to. No one got a home run, but the polo ponies felt well-rested.
The cheerleaders exchange clothes with the referees and the pom poms get put to good use when TIIC show up for the post game celebration. There was some personal fouls involved with this, but it was all for a good cause.
Ryan and Zach slap each other on the butt even though neither one played in the game. They then said “It doesn’t get any better than this” and take each other’s hands and skip to the Casino. Spike hates being in the kiddie pool. He wonders where it’s been. He also hates the water wings as he’s now 27 and thinks an inner tube would be more appropriate.
It wasn’t much of a game, but then this isn’t much of a commentary. Sorry.
The Moralizing Martins vs The Chippie’s Chandlers - Friday Football
Color commentary Dr. Hayward
Referees: Myrtle, Ruth, Joe, Jackson, Palmer, Opal and Brooke
Cheerleaders: KWAK, Babe, Bianca, Josh, Erica, Kendall and Simone
Mascot: Spike
Coin Toss: Chandlers win. They choose to receive
Tad kicks off
Adam catches the ball and runs ten yards up the center before fumbling. Tad recovers the ball and tosses it to KWAK.
KWAK throws it into the stands where Dr. Hayward catches it. KWAK leads the cheer: “Give me a W, Give me a T, Give me a D! What’s that spell? What’s that spell?
BABE: Um, Josh? Jamie? Some random guy to be named later?
KWAK: You’re your mamma’s babydawl after all.
Adam, now, balless must decide what tactic his team should use. Huddling, the Chandlers pass a bottle of scotch and decide that they can still play, minus their ball but look to TIIC for signals.
Adam: They’re giving the Hail Mary Signal.
JR: Well, how many rosaries do we have between us?
Adam: Um, well at last count, NONE.
JR: Pass that scotch here.
Adam: Wait, now TIIC are giving us the finger. I say we punt.
JR: But it’s only second down.
Adam: Yes, but had KWAK punted on second down, we wouldn’t be here right now and you wouldn’t be a big brother yet again.
JR: I love you, dad.
Commercial
LIKE A ROCK. Ye gads, can’t this commercial erode already. The Grand Canyon did and in less time than this commercial has been airing.
Spike comes out dressed in a kiddie pool and a hockey uniform. Fans go crazy. “Where’s his water wings?” It’s an outrage.
Back to the game –
Dr. Hayward: I want a personal foul performed against Tad
Ruth: I don’t think you’re allowed to give PERSONAL commentary, David.
Dr. Hayward: Well, this coming from a woman no one’s seen in thirty-years, wears an apron and lives in an attic. I want a personal foul committed against Tad and I’m willing to do it myself. Someone needs to. And soon.
Myrtle: I think that the Chandlers are in big trouble. Excuse me, I’m meeting Zach for a martini or two. I’ll come back after I reapply my lipstick and give my opinions after the final score. Which hopefully I’ll get one first.
Somehow the game is over and the score is 123 to 122 in over-time. Jamie made the final free-throw, Tad hit Adam with his hockey puck, Ryan punched the clock out and Jonathon killed all the umpires because the fans told him to. No one got a home run, but the polo ponies felt well-rested.
The cheerleaders exchange clothes with the referees and the pom poms get put to good use when TIIC show up for the post game celebration. There was some personal fouls involved with this, but it was all for a good cause.
Ryan and Zach slap each other on the butt even though neither one played in the game. They then said “It doesn’t get any better than this” and take each other’s hands and skip to the Casino. Spike hates being in the kiddie pool. He wonders where it’s been. He also hates the water wings as he’s now 27 and thinks an inner tube would be more appropriate.
It wasn’t much of a game, but then this isn’t much of a commentary. Sorry.